Thursday, February 06, 2003


This past quarter the ballroom dance club has been steadily on a downhill run. I knew it, and the people that attended regularly knew it, but nothing was being done about it. Because I am available to talk (and cuz I like to think I'm a nice guy to talk to) people came to me with the complaints of how things were running. I finally got fed up with getting told how things should be done and having to explain that it's not my place and that our President hasn't done anything about it. So I took charge. I have scheduled weekly officer meetings, I run the meetings, I do all the paperwork I contact the people, and assign work to be done so that everything runs smoothly. It's hard to salvage in the middle of the quarter though. I'm scrounging right now to get places and people for events so that there is some semblance of something going on. Upon my acquisition of responsibility a new publicist was elected and she has been working her butt off for us to get fliers made so that things will be publicized in plenty of time before the event. At the officer meetings we have come up with ideas and things that need to get done, people are assigned tasks, and the tasks get done. It's a beautiful thing. It's a shame that all the officer boards I'm a part of didn't run like that...

Spent some time working on the Tuba webpage today. I've been getting harped on enough to do that. You can check it out at Granted it's just a start, because of lack of content, but hey, it works. It only took me an hour or so too. You get what you put into it.

I went to Madonna last night. Thankfully Mary still showed up, I was only marginally worried that she might not. She was looking remarkably stress-free. In fact, more stress free than I've seen her in about the last 2 weeks. It's good to know that I could at least cater to that need of hers. I think the worst part was seeing how radiant she looked, all dressed up, seeing a smile on her face and knowing that none of it was because of me.
I've grown numb again.
I've felt so lethargic all day today and have rather pessimistic thoughts on life. I'm back to where I was 6 months ago. At least I know I don't change. The mask is still there to cover me and fits into place so naturally. Maybe that's why it feels like so few people really know anyting about me.

It's too bad that the only times I write in this journal is when I have sad depressing things on my mind and am dumping it out. Oh well, you guys are the ones reading it. Mayhap someday something happy will be on here.

"It's better to have loved and lost, then to never have loved at all."
"Try it."

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